Plantain chips

plantain-chipsI have never reblogged anything before, but then again, I don’t remember the last time I enjoyed a short story this much. Enjoy! 

P.S: I miss you guys! 😢

**Here I’m experimenting with imagery. Too wordy? I think I overdid it XD.   He was almost there. He shivered as he walked, despite his brisk pace. It was cold out, and the air smelled of oncoming rain. The moon hung full and polite in the night sky, casting its borrowed light sparingly, as though […]

https://scratchesinthedirt.wordpress.com/2016/02/10/plantain-chips/

When I die

Many people have written poems about death- with deep statements about appreciating life while you have it. This isn’t one of them. Besides we all know I am not a poet- I tell stories. It is just something that popped in my head after I saw this picture on Nana Kofi Acquah’s timeline. You should go and see his photo exhibition at Alliance Francaise- ‘Don’t call me beautiful’. Intriguing name, isn’t it? Anyway, on to my impromptu poem😊 


When I die, you should cry.

At least I’d be flattered if you did. 

For those of you whose tear ducts are on retirement, you can do a moment of silence. That also works. 

I am a crybaby- I plan to cry when I am saying my vows, when I first learn that I am pregnant, when I get my first car (I love troskis but we must move on), when I finally become a lawyer, when my son says ‘Mummy, I love you’ for the very first time…

You get the picture, don’t you?

Tears have a soothing effect. They also make me sleep soundly – like a baby who has had a good helping of Mama’s delicious milk. 

I will be honoured if you cry. 

But don’t cry too much. It is not that deep.

People die everyday, and while it is heartless to say this while the person is weeping, tears won’t bring the person back. 

I’ll like it if you wear purple and white at my funeral. 

And give out chocolates. 

And play good music. (No Shatta Wale, I repeat, no Shatta Wale!)

After all, it is a celebration of life.

My life. 

And that life was full of the colour purple, good music and chocolate😁😁

I don’t want a wake keeping, or a one year celebration or a thanksgiving lunch. They will just be tiresome for my husband and children. You could dedicate a song to me or painting or a building or something like that. I no bore. 

I don’t plan to die any time soon. Not at all. Fear not.

I will die old, active and sexy. 😀

Most importantly, when I die, the story won’t end in the grave. 

Capital High Ep11: Cinderella 

Hiya! Episode 10 was my favourite episode. Once again, Gagert killed it! 🙌🏾🙌🏾 I think she is slowly becoming everyone’s favourite girl. And for those of you who have crushes on K Beck, I am sorry to say that he only exists in my mind. But take heart, there are boys just as amazing (and even more amazing) than he is! This week’s episode is actually dedicated to someone who is so amazing that it has become the prefix to his name.  Now, on to this week’s episode! 

‘I saw you that day’

Curtis had such a cocky smile on his face. It was difficult to ignore him especially with that leering look he had on.

‘Where?’

‘Allow me to refresh your memory. After your boyfriend got me internally suspended, he gave you a peck in front of the Liberty House downs. Does that sound familiar?’

Akpene instantly felt sick in her stomach. She could immediately see where he was taking this.

‘I am sure you are wondering what I plan to do with that information. That really depends on you. You see, I don’t get why this boy likes you as much as he does, but then again that makes you his weakest point. Clearly, he would get suspended for you without a second thought, but I know you don’t want that. I need you to hurt him. Avoid him. Talk to other boys. Kiss some other dude. I don’t care. Just hurt him. It is either that or I will go and report both of you for trespassing and kissing. Oh, I could even say you were having sex. It is really your word against mine. Both of you will get dismissed from the school and we both know that this is the only shot that you’ve got. So what is it going to be?’

Palms sweaty, knees unsteady, Akpene swallowed hard. All sorts of thoughts were running through her mind. When she finally spoke, her voice was void of emotion.

‘Go right ahead’

‘I believe you understand the consequences of what you are choosing.’

‘Do you need me to spell it out for you? Do your worst, Curtis. If you honestly think that your only shot at happiness is making K Beck miserable, then you are a really sad person. Like you said, it will be your word against mine. Do you honestly think Gagert will listen to you, after everything that has happened in the last two weeks? Do your worst.’

‘This blind devotion to K Beck will backfire, I can assure you. This Cinderella meets her Prince thing you have going on right now will only last for a season. Have you thought of what will happen when we vacate? You come from different worlds, different socializations. You will realize that this thing can only work within the walls of Capital High. Call me prophet of doom, if you want to. Truth is the truth mehn!’

He shrugged and walked off. His plan had not fallen into place like he was hoping it would, but the look in Akpene’s eyes when he mentioned their Cinderella situation gave him a little joy. She was also afraid that their worlds will pull them apart once they left the confines of Capital High. He could work with that for now.

Akpene had been worrying about this, especially because Mid-terms were around the corner. She had not fully recovered from the ‘Baby Girl’ episode. She pushed the thoughts back as she briskly walked back to her class. The new teachers were still adjusting to the Capital High rhythm and she didn’t want to be in the bad books of any of them.

Especially Polar Bear.

He was-like his name suggested- as big as a polar bear. He had hair growing out of his ears and when he frowned, his eyes became mere slits on his face. Every morning, he insisted on having surprise tests on random topics in Elective Maths and every mistake came with three strokes of his cane. It was as thick as one of his fingers- and his fingers were very thick! All the boys feared his cane and those who had not tasted it had heard of it. Polar Bear never hit the same place twice and you could never tell where he would hit next. It was smarter to just stand there, completely at his mercy. Anyone who received lashes from Polar Bear had a hard time sitting down afterwards.  It was rumored that he soaked his cane in a pepper solution every evening for an hour and left it to dry overnight. That would explain why the lashes seemed to burn you.

The boys had of course named the cane Ogya*. After three days, they had come up with a plan to steal the cane, spearheaded by the notorious Form 2 boys who were often at the receiving end of Polar Bear’s lashes. They stole it and broke it into several pieces. The next day, he walked into the dining hall with an even thicker cane- Ogya 2.0. It sent a message to everyone- Ogya is untouchable.

‘Surprise test. Take a sheet of paper.’

‘Oh sir!’

‘Sir, we beg’

‘Who said that?’

Then there would be stony silence.

There was also Ms. Avoka, the Social Studies teacher. This was another Mr Quarshie. She also had the r and l problem. As if that was not enough, she inserted an ‘H’ in front of every single word beginning with a vowel, like a Ga would- and yet she could not speak any Ghanaian language.

‘Citizenship his an himportant part hof hour syllabus’

‘Madam, please repeat that.’

‘Hask your friends.’

That afternoon, after lunch, Akpene noticed a Land Cruiser parked in front of the Administration block. It had a chop box and a mattress beside it, and she wondered why whoever it was had waited this long to come to school. She didn’t have to wait too long to find out.

‘My name is Brianna Naa Awula Adamafio, but everyone calls me Awula.’

It was hard not to like her. She had full cheeks and a toothpaste advert- worthy smile. She was a little shorter than Akpene and she had a dimple smack in the middle of her chin. She looked well brought up but her eyes twinkled with mischief, implying that she had a sense of humour. Her hair was dark and curly, and her eyebrows looked like they needed to be tamed. Her toenails were perfect and her sandals looked expensive.

Mr Quarshie asked her to sit behind K Beck and continued his class on sources of energy. During the class, Akpene turned to take a ruler from the girl behind and saw K Beck handing over his notebook to Awula so that she could see how much they had done. Awula smiled and mouthed a thank you. It was a simple gesture but it filled Akpene’s heart with an emotion she had now become accustomed to ever since K Beck became a part of her life- jealousy or as K Beck preferred to call it, perimeter breach.

‘Ei madam. Anytime you feel that someone has breached your perimeter, an alarm goes off in your head, doesn’t it?’ He had still not stopped teasing her about the Baby Girl episode.

And now this..

Awula was a lot like her, physique-wise. The fact that she came from a rich home did not even show. She was down to earth, funny and mischevious. She also had a healthy appetite. Ordinarily, Akpene would have been excited to have found a kindred spirit but her conversation with Curtis kept ringing in her head.

Even though K Beck still made time for her, she could tell that it was more natural for him to connect with Awula. Take for instance, the day they were talking about toasters. That was something that she could not relate to. The closest she had come to a toaster was seeing it in a magazine, so she could only keep quiet as they chattered about how to get the bread to be golden brown. They went on for about 10 minutes while Akpene just looked at her feet. If it wasn’t toasters, then it was the struggle of having a pompous househelp or what events to attend during the Christmas holidays or a witty banter about something she had no idea about.

When they went on the Mid-term break, Akpene knew that it would be a difficult 5 days because she did not have any means of communicating with K Beck. He offered to come by and visit her but she didn’t think it was a good idea. The truth was that she was embarrassed to show him where she lived. She lost herself in the routine of helping her mother, occasionally pausing to wonder what K Beck was up to.

When the break was over, she was eager to go back to school and see him. She bumped into Awula at the entrance to their house.

‘Akpene! We missed you during the break.’

‘We?’

‘Yes. K Beck and I.’

‘You saw each other during the break?’

‘Yes, almost everyday. It was a lot of fun.’

‘I see. Good for you.’

Akpene cleared her throat as if to blame the tremble in her voice on phylegms. She mumbled an excuse and left Awula behind.

It is already starting. It is only a matter of time before he chooses Awula. It is easier for him.

She walked past everyone who was jubilating or groaning about being back in school  and went to sit in their classroom. It was only when the door shut behind her that she allowed the tears to fall.

Note: I have some sad news. Capital High is going on a break. We will be back on 27th February. Don’t miss me too much 😁. Happy Val’s Day in advance! Save me some chocolate! 😉

Capital High Ep10: Clean up

Hi there! Apologies for not posting the story yesterday. I wrote an exam in the evening and my brain was too tired to write a story that would be good enough. Thanks for being understanding and thanks for keeping me on my toes. God knows I would have been a very lazy writer if it wasn’t for you. You guys rock! Happy reading!!

NB: Special shoutout to the lady who tapped me in the trotro this morning and said ‘I love your stories.’ You made my day.

‘How did this happen? We had a foolproof plan!’

‘By foolproof, you mean your plan to overthrow me as leader of the coup? You are the one who messed everything up.’

‘Don’t even try to push this on me. I didn’t ask you to be a punching bag for your wife.’

Rejoice tried to stifle her laughter. It was like a circus in there. They had spent the last hour tossing the blame around. Ms Ampadu was convinced that there was a mole amongst them. She was looking round at everyone suspiciously, as though she could see ‘Traitor’ written on their foreheads.

‘Afrakuma! Where is she?’, Ms Ampadu suddenly shrieked. She looked like she had been possessed by an evil spirit. Her eyes looked bloodshot and her face had aged 10 years in the last 2 hours. ‘Call her for me! She didn’t even show up. Drag that snitch here by the collar, if you have to. Brian, move! Now!’

Mr Hormeku started laughing. ‘That damned Gagert! Nothing ever works with her. I would never have been a match for her anyways. Now, I have lost my job. I have spent all these years, waiting to take over from her and it is all messed up because you could not keep your mouth shut. Why involve Afrakuma? She is one of the slyest girls in this school. As slippery as an eel. And of course, you did it without consulting me. I was foolish to have trusted you.’

‘You are a good for nothing man. Just look at how easily you are giving up. I blame myself for even aligning myself with you. Sure, run away. Go like a dog with his tail in between his legs. I am not going down without a fight. I plan to take as many people down with me as possible. If you are not ready to be ruthless, then you don’t belong in this fight.’

Mr Addae Mensah broke his silence. ‘You are going way too far, Ms. Ampadu. There are students in this room. How can you humiliate your co-worker this way?’

‘If I were you, Mr. Addae Mensah, I would be very quiet. Don’t get me started!’

‘I’ll stop you right there. We all made the mistake of attempting to overthrow Gertrude. I am especially remorseful because I should have known better. This pathetic show you are putting up will not make this situation any better. Because of your greed, a lot of the teachers here have lost their jobs today. If I were you, I would cut my losses and move on. The earlier you accept that you will never be as good as Gagert, the better.’ On that note, he picked up his car keys, nodded at Mr Hormeku and walked out of the room.

Just then, Brian arrived with Afrakuma in tow. She looked like she had just woken up from sleep, the sleep lines on her face giving her away.

‘You are the one who snitched to Gagert, aren’t you?’

‘Well, yes- and no.’

‘Listen, don’t play games with me. Did you tell her or not?’

‘I told her. But it wasn’t news to her. Someone else had already told her. And it is nothing personal. I don’t like to lose and to be fair, I knew you didn’t stand a chance with her. And judging from the looks of everyone seated here, I was right. Anyway, I am not your snitch, go and look for him or her elsewhere.’

‘Not so fast. I am not done with you.’

‘But I am done with you. What can you do? Punish me? If I know Gagert the way I do, you are probably going to be fired tomorrow morning. Now if you will excuse me, I have WASSCE to prepare for. This has been nice.’

By the next morning, the story had already spread like wildfire. There were hushed whispers in every classroom, dormitory and bathhouse.

‘Ei, have you heard? There was a coup last night oo’

‘But these people paa? Even I know better than to attempt to overthrow Gagert. Gagert die3, legend oo. Untouchable.’

‘So are they really going to resign? Who will prepare the Form 3s for the exams?’

‘I hear she slayed the thing and walked out of there like a boss.’

‘I wonder who told her about it. You really can’t trust people these days oo!’

The knot in Denise’s stomach tightened some more. Ever since the day she overheard Ms Ampadu on the phone talking about the coup, she had been anticipating this day. Her initial reaction was to stay as far away from the situation as possible, however keeping the secret felt burdensome. She could not talk to Adriana about it because she was busy entertaining the advances of Kwapong, one of the ‘Dream come true’ boys in Form 3. After Curtis’ fiasco, she had decided that he was too childish to be the object of her affection. She was now setting her sights on ‘bigger fish’.

Only God knows how Denise ended up in front of Gagert’s office two weeks later.

‘Yes, come in. You don’t need to knock a third time. I am not deaf.’

‘G-good afternoon madam.’

‘Good afternoon. How may I help you?’

‘Erm, I came because I overheard a conversation that I thought might be useful to you.’

‘Yes, go on.’

‘Ms Ampadu and a few other teachers are planning to overthrow you. They have been planning it for a while.’

‘And how did you come by this information?’

‘I clean Ms Ampadu’s house every other day. I overheard a phone conversation.’

‘I see. Who else is in on it?’

‘She mentioned Mr Hormeku in the conversation. I don’t know if he is in on it or not.’

‘Alright. Thank you. I will take it from here. One more thing- let’s keep this strictly between us, shall we?’

‘Certainly, madam.’

Ever since then, Denise had been living in constant fear that Ms Ampadu would find her and punish her. Until today. It was finally over.

Gagert sat in the assembly hall, waiting for the students to get there. They would come in, chattering loudly and suddenly hush up when they finally noticed her. She heard a few of them calling her Gagert but today was not a day for petty crimes like calling her Gagert. She had bigger fish to fry. When it was 7:30, she rose up and stood in front of them. 1,364 pairs of eyes pored at her.

‘Good morning. I know you have all heard versions of whatever happened last night. Let me cut to the chase. A number of teachers attempted to overthrow me in what we call an in-house coup. What you need to know is the coup failed-woefully. All teachers who were involved in this coup will proceed on an indefinite leave, effective immediately. The students who were involved in this coup- specifically those of you who vandalized the Science Lab and broke bounds will be dismissed from this school. All you need to know is that the school will continue to function normally. There will be no changes in your routine. Go to class. Eat your meals. Gossip. Study during prep- at least, pretend to. And nobody should under any circumstances speak to the press. I repeat, nobody. I will clean up this mess myself. That would be all. Have a good day.’

When the students rose to sing the school anthem, Gagert spotted Kwamena Welbeck and her breath instantly caught in her throat. With his slightly overgrown hair and his nonchalant mannerisms, he could pass for his father in the 60s very easily. Papa Kofi Welbeck had been her first love. He wooed her by climbing their headmaster’s mango tree to harvest mangoes for her, even though it was a very risky thing to do. Loving Papa Kofi felt like an adventure. You could never tell what was coming. They broke bounds one Valentine’s Day, because he wanted to take her dancing. Her most pleasant memory from those days was the look in his eyes as they danced to Elvis Presley’s Stuck on you, under the disco lights. She was wearing shoes that didn’t fit and her lipstick felt uncomfortable but she knew then that there was nowhere else she would rather be.

Even though she would not admit it, she knew that she had made a mistake by letting him go. He wasn’t ambitious enough for her. She wanted him to be a lawyer because she knew he would be great at it but he wasn’t interested. If she could advise her younger self, she would have been a lot easier on him, because as it turns out, he did not turn out badly at all. The first time she met him again after school, she discovered that her body had not forgotten what it felt like anytime he smiled his boyish smile. The tingling feelings disappeared when she saw his wedding ring. He was taken.

Funny enough, they kept bumping into each other, especially after his wife died. This time, she was the one who was married and she kept cursing her stars that they had such bad timing. The only thing she could settle for was is his friendship. It was the only choice she had left. Anytime any of his sons got into trouble, it gave her an excuse to see him. It was easy to talk to him. He still knew his way around her and he had talked sense into her head on a number of occasions. Once in a while, they had lunch together to catch up as old friends, and each time, Gagert had to remind herself that she could not have him.

K Beck strained his neck one last time. There she was. He waited until she had just turned the corner and then he pulled her by the hand.

‘Damn it, Akpene! You are driving me crazy.’

‘What are you doing? People will start talking about us.’

‘Let them talk. It is the least of my worries. Why are you avoiding me?’

‘Nothing. No reason.’

K Beck sighed and tried again.

‘It can’t be nothing. What happened? You haven’t said two words to me since we got back from Interco.’

‘I didn’t think you would notice. Aren’t you too busy basking in your glory as star player for Capital High?’

‘Is that what this is about? It doesn’t make sense.’

‘It doesn’t? Maybe you should ask Baby Girl to help you make sense of it.’

K Beck started laughing.

‘Oh this is funny, isn’t it? I am done discussing this.’

She started walking away and K Beck pulled her by the hand.

‘First of all, Baby GIrl is my classmate from JSS.’

‘You are still calling her that!’

‘Oh my goodness, this is so cute. I am calling her that because that was her nickname. She was the smallest girl in our class and someone named her Baby Girl as a joke. The name stuck. Nothing personal, Akpene. I can’t believe you have been avoiding me because of this. But this is good news. You will only be jealous if you have feelings for me. K Beck shoots, K Beck scores. He has Akpene’s heart and the crowd goes wild!’

Akpene tried to stifle the laughter in spite of her embarrassment. She could only shake her head.

‘You are very annoying.’

‘That’s one of the things you like about me. I missed you.’

‘I missed you too. And the fresh bread from your table.’

‘Oh, it’s about the food, huh? Opportunist.’

‘You are so full of yourself.’

K Beck grinned. He had missed this- the sarcastic banter.

‘Now, can we go to class before the senior on duty chances upon us?’

‘By all means, milady!’

Curtis was angry. His father’s involvement meant that he had very little time to take his revenge on K Beck. He was going to be transferred to Akosombo International, and even though they had a pool, he was not keen on going there. He would not have as much clout and authority there as he did here.

‘Time to fast forward that plan.’

See you next week! 😉 

Capital High 09: Hostile Takeover 

Yep! Yet another #capitalhighwednesday is here with us! I hope you enjoyed Episode 8, even though it was difficult to write. Many of you have asked me if I plan to finish Little Foxes. The truth is I would have loved to, but I think leaving the outcome to your imagination makes the story powerful. We will be drawing the curtain on Capital High in a few weeks’ time and I would really love to know if there are any SHS/SSS experiences you think I have not touched on, before we end the series. But, by all means, enjoy this week’s episode. -Keni 🙂

‘And on behalf of the board and the  entire school, I would like to say a very big thank you to the sports team for raising the flag of Capital High high. You put in your best against all odds. We are very proud of you, especially our star player, Kwamena Welbeck.’

The whole auditorium erupted with applause. Lawrence, the sports prefect, beamed as Gagert handed over the trophy to him. He in turn handed it over to K Beck, who lifted it above his shoulders. The chants of ‘K Beck! K Beck! K Beck!’ got even louder and transitioned into loud cheers. K Beck’s smile dimmed when he realized that Akpene was not clapping. She had a stony look on her face, her forehead furrowed with worry wrinkles.

Gagert led the school to triumphantly sing the school anthem, K Beck keeping his eyes on Akpene the whole time. It seemed like she was avoiding his eyes.

Capital High, a land where dreams are nurtured; Capital High, a land where hope is watered; We will strive for excellence to make Ghana our motherland proud.

When the assembly was over, he was immediately swarmed by teachers and seniors who wanted to congratulate him. He helplessly watched Akpene disappear into the crowd.

Pull yourself together, Akpene. You already know that men are not to be trusted. Your mistake was believing that K Beck was an exception to that rule.

She angrily brushed the tears off her face and headed to the classroom. Unknown to her, Curtis was watching her from the stairs leading to the staff common room.

It is almost time, Curtis. Be battle ready…

In that same staff common room, Mr Hormeku smiled at his Nokia E5 phone and smiled.

It is almost time, Confidence. The time is here..

The murmuring went on for a while.

Make you no forget oo! Gbeke time, during prep.

Terror go come?

Naah, he no dey mong.

That guy be fearro. Forget am. I shy for am sef. Fearro like your type, wey your nicky be Terror. Like dem for call am Kitten.

Guys stick to the plan oo! We can’t afford to make a mistake.

They broke off the conversation when they saw Gagert approaching, with a cane in her hand.

‘Shouldn’t you be in class by now?’

‘We are on our way, madam!’

The moment K Beck entered his classroom, everyone began to applaud- even the Agricultural Science teacher, Mr Quarshie. He had really suffered in the hands of the boys in this class. His r and l seemed to have merged, as far as his tongue was concerned. His L always sounded like a combination of r and l, more often than not with the wrong letter being dominant. He always insisted on dictating notes to the class and a normal day would go like this:

Mr Q: …and the chrolophyll in the reaves

Student: Sir, the what?

Mr Q: the chrolophyll

Student B: Please say it slowly

Mr Q: Chro-lo-phyll

Student A: Sir, can you write it for us?

Mr Quarshie will turn to the board and write it in capital letters: CHLOROPHYLL

Student C: But Sir, you said Chro instead of Chlo

Mr Quarshie: Get out of my class!

Student A: Oh Sir, prease he begs.

Mr Quarshie would angrily pack his books and walk out of the class with the parting words:

‘Consider this topic taught!’

Not today, he was in a good mood and when K Beck entered the classroom, he proceeded to congratulate him with a handshake.

‘I used to be a basketball prayer in my time.’

As expected, one of the back benchers quipped,’a basketball what?’

Everyone burst into laughter. Once again, K Beck noticed that Akpene’s smile did not reach her eyes.

Maybe I am overthinking things. But this is strange. What could be wrong with her?

She rushed out as soon as the siren went off for lunch and yet K Beck could not find her in the dining hall. It almost felt like a game of hide and seek. Right after dining, he rushed out, trying to find her before siesta, but the Liberation House boys had other plans for him. They greeted him at the entrance with buckets of water, gari mixed with sand, Close up toothpaste and Milo. After mixing the concoction into one big bucket, they started pouring it on him, making sure that every inch of his body was lavishly covered in it. His shoes felt heavy and he was beginning to itch.

Talk about timing! I’ll have to find her later on…

Rejoice was nervous. She knew that Gagert was definitely not aware of this emergency meeting going on in the staff common room. She also knew that Mr Hormeku and Ms Ampadu were planning something terrible. She also knew that Gagert was worried about it. In her three years as Gagert’s secretary, she had never seen her this worried about anything. Not even when Gagert suspected that her husband was cheating on her. Rejoice hesitated before knocking at her door.

‘Madam, there is an emergency meeting in the staff common room.’

‘There is? Who called it? I will be there shortly.’

Gagert picked up her bottle of water and her diary and headed towards the staff common room. It was filled with an interesting mix of people- the chairman of the School Board, a rep from GES (Ghana Education Service), some teachers and the SRC President. At the head of the table was Mr Hormeku, beside himself with joy.

‘Good afternoon. I understand that there is an emergency meeting. I am not aware of the agenda. Can anyone be kind enough to let me know what it is?’

‘Gertrude, we are here because a number of us have lost confidence in your leadership. This can end in two ways: you either resign or we drag you down from the throne that you have erected for yourself.’, Mr Hormeku said.

‘I see. And every single one of you shares this view?’, she turned around to look at every single person in the room. The SRC President, Brian, squirmed when her gaze lingered on his face.

‘Yes, Mrs Asante Poku. All of us share that view’, Ms. Ampadu haughtily replied.

‘Well then, let’s hear what you all have to say.’

‘Allow me to take you through the many reasons why. You have become a tyrannical leader, making decisions to suit your own interests. We expressed our unhappiness with you selling the old bus and yet today I saw the For Sale sign behind it. The students are out of control. As we speak, some boys have vandalized the Science lab and broken bounds. We have suspicions about how the school funds are managed. As teachers, we still haven’t received the bonuses you promised us. Our bungalows have still not been renovated. We are tired of you as Headmistress, simply put. I have a petition here signed by 60% of the student body. As you can see, a majority of the teachers are here. The PTA Chair is also here. The writing is on the wall. Just step down!’

‘Ms. Ampadu, why have you allowed power and greed to blind you momentarily? First of all, when you are planning a coup, there must be a clear leader. Hormeku is seated in the main chair but you have done almost all of the talking. It is clear that you don’t even trust his leadership. I know for a fact that you were planning a coup inside this coup. Hormeku, you didn’t know that, did you? I don’t blame her. A man who is beaten by his own wife is not ready to run a school, definitely not a school like Capital High. She has every cause to doubt your competence.

Secondly, I don’t understand your obsession with the old bus. It consumes more fuel, doesn’t take as much people as the new one and it has broken down twice in the last week. No responsible parent will feel comfortable loading their children into such a bus, so yes I am selling it. Funny you should mention the boys vandalizing the Science Lab. I have very reliable sources that tell me that you paid the boys to vandalize it. I am more convinced about that information because I discovered the mess and I locked up the place and hid the key. How did you know about the vandalization if I have not mentioned and you are allegedly not aware of whoever may have instigated this? I also know that they have broken bounds. I actually saw them leave. I thought it was so strange for them to leave at a time when they knew I was around. Those who break bounds usually wait until I have gone home. Surprised? This is my school. I built it up. I know how it works.’

Mr Addae Mensah spoke up, ‘This is the problem I have with you, Gertrude. This sense of possessiveness.’

‘I was coming to you. Mr. Addae Mensah, you are only here because I suspended your son. I am sorry but nobody is above the law in this school. He deserved it. No product of this school should go round objectifying girls and bullying his classmates. He is lucky that he was not deboardinized. Nobody is above the law here, not even if his monthly pocket money can cover my fuel expenses for a month. I am honestly appalled that you allowed yourself to be dragged into this murky business. You are supposed to be the unifier, not the sponsor of the coup makers. Back to you, Ampadu and Co. Many people are not privy to the financial situation of this school, but at least you are. When the funds to commence the renovation come in, you know I will do it. If you were at the last staff meeting, you would also know why bonuses have not been paid. Like I said, until I am convinced that every one of the Form 3s will get at least a B in every WASSCE core subject, no bonuses will be paid. There is a reason why they are discretionary. Key word here is discretion and I am the one who exercises that right. The students did not sign that petition. They signed a petition to include groundnut soup and chicken in the menu for next term, but you altered it.’

The room had become very quiet and Gagert’s voice was booming. Rejoice pushed her thighs together even more tightly. She badly needed to visit the washroom but she didn’t want to miss a word of what her boss was saying.

‘I can see looks of regret on some faces. You have been misled, haven’t you? I hate to dole out ‘coup making’ advice, but you should have really waited until you had an air tight story. Not everyone on your team is actually on your side. Some of them planted themselves there, just to make sure that the interest of this school is protected. Ampadu, if you had waited just a few more months, I would have stepped down and handed over to you. I am not as young as I used to be. I have eyes and ears everywhere but Capital High needs some fresh blood. You were the obvious choice. You just had to ruin it. I am glad you have a rep from GES here. It makes this much easier for me. This will work in one of two ways: I will wait your resignation letters. After a week, I will just suspend those who haven’t mustered the courage to resign yet. This has been fun. Now if you will excuse me, I have a school to run.’

She pulled back her chair and walked out, the sound of her heels echoing in the hollow hallway. Gagert sat at her desk in the dark for a long time. After what seems like three hours, she began to hum a song.

In the jungle, the mighty jungle,

The lion sleeps tonight..

Hush, my darling, don’t fear, my darling

The lion sleeps tonight…

See you next week! 😉

Capital High Ep08: Competition

Hi guys!! Yet another set of milestones to celebrate- 70,000 views and a new domain name- http://www.kenikodjo.com! Yep, we are making it ‘so much big’ and it is all thanks to you guys! Every blogger deserves readers like you. You are super awesome! This week, I am venturing into unchartered waters. I have never been to Interco before and I know very little about sports, unless you are counting my ‘dutiful’ affiliation to FC Barcelona.(Yeah mehn, I have a jersey and all!) 😀
I am sure you are thinking, ‘Keni, this is not why we are here.’ On that note, let me shut up and allow you to enjoy the story. Happy reading!!

Curtis frowned at the bucket one more time and then kicked it. The soapy water spilled over the terrazzo floor.

That damned K Beck boy!

The pungent smell of bodily waste hit him once again and he groaned aloud. He had never scrubbed- not for a single day in his life. His father’s influence had saved from the strenuous work portions. He still hasn’t held a cutlass ever since he got to school and the only time he carried a bucket was when he had to take a bath. And yet, thanks to K Beck, he had blisters from scrubbing and mopping.

If I smell Parazone one more time, I am sure I will puke. This wasn’t supposed to happen. I am the one who got beaten. All for his beloved Akpene. What kind of name is that anyway?

Curtis decided to take yet another break. He had taken one every 10 minutes since he started, because he could not stand the conflicting smells. He sniffed in the burst of fresh air the moment he stepped out of the downs. Taking a cursory glance at the second Liberty downs, he stopped in his tracks. He turned a second time and there was K Beck giving Akpene a peck right before his very eyes. He smiled to himself. This information could come in handy, seeing as Akpene had broken two rules from the Code of Conduct- Rule 57: No crossing over and Rule 64: Intimacy is prohibited among students.

Don’t rush it, Curtis. Revenge is sweetest when you bide your time.

Akpene was stunned.

It wasn’t that she had not imagined this in her mind a number of times. No, she didn’t imagine that it would happen in front of the Liberty downs. What amazed her most was how much she enjoyed it. It felt like her whole body had been set on fire. She blurted the first thing that came to her mind, ‘Wait, what are you doing?’ and instantly wished that she could scoop the words back into her mouth.

K Beck immediately felt uneasy.

‘I am sorry. Too soon? I ruined everything, didn’t I?’

‘No, it is ok. You don’t see me running, do you?’

‘Well, that could be because you are paralyzed with fear. I know I shouldn’t have. I just-‘

‘Kwamena, it’s fine. We are fine.’

‘Does that mean I can do it again?’, he asked with a mischievous smile on his face.

The siren blurred and it was Akpene’s time to smile.

‘The term saved by the bell has never been more appropriate. See you later!’

K Beck waited until she was out of sight before punching the air with an air of victory.

Lawrence, the sports prefect, shook K Beck one more time, jostling him out of his sleep.

‘Welbeck! Wake up! Time for training!’

This was the hardest part of the entire process.

Waking up in the mornings.

He sighed, pulled himself out of bed and headed out into the cold to warm up with a few jumping jacks on the football field.

Interco was in a week’s time.

This meant that he was either training, in class or asleep. He had very little time to do anything else and Akpene was worried that he was not studying enough. She had promised to copy his notes for the period that he would be away. That was his favourite thing about training for interco- having her fuss over him. There were times when he would exaggerate the pains he had from training, just to have her offer to massage his ankles or accompany him to the sick bay. The extra food was always a plus. The sports team always had extra portions of food. He always saved the fresh bread for Akpene because he knew she liked bread.

The sports guys were treated like precious stones, more especially the star players. They were excused from chores so they could train. The teachers were softer on them and more lenient with deadlines for submission of assignments. Gagert always hosted the team for dinner in her house before they left and encouraged them to lift the Capital High flag high. The whole school would cheer for them as the bus left the school compound, with people shouting out the name of their favourite players. Being in the sports team was attractive, which would explain why a lot of the boys had applied to join the team. For the first three weeks, Lawrence would subject the team to a lot of strenuous exercises. He called it the ‘weeding out phase’. By the end of the second week, most of the ‘claim to fame’ guys would have opted out of the group.

Interco usually lasted a whole week. This year, Capital High was competing in three different disciplines – relay races, basketball and football. K Beck was both a defender in the football team and a shooter for the basketball team. The players were at the El-Wak stadium throughout the week but Gagert usually allowed some students to go and cheer the team on Thursday and Friday.

Now, getting on the list to go and watch Interco was a different ball game altogether. It was a strictly ‘who you know and who you are’ affair. Trouble causers had no place on the list. The PE teacher, Mr Amissah, took special delight in removing all those who did not take PE seriously that term from the list. Any senior who had a score to settle with a guy from another school made sure his name was on the list. Some of them just went to scout for ‘fresh meat’- the pretty Form 1 girls from other schools. The school daughters of the prefects and Capital High’s most powerful got first dibs among the juniors. Those who did not belong to that group had to lobby to get on the list. Arku Korsah, one of the form one boys, was desperate to go for Interco this year because he had promised his JSS girlfriend that she would see him at Interco. He started his lobbying early, dutifully bringing Lawrence a tin of milk or sardine every other day, along with a gentle ‘Senior Lawrenzo, make you no forget oo!’ Lawrence did not intend to put his name on the list but somehow he felt bad about ‘bouncing’ him outright, so he gave him one last impossible task.

‘Arku Korsah, you try waa. E lef one last thing.’

‘Oh ok. What dat?’

‘Ampadu airs out her brassiere every day after school. I want you to go and remove it from her drying line and bring it to me.’

‘A-a-ampadu? House mistress Ampadu?’

‘Which other Ampadu do you know? E go be problem?’

‘Oh naah. No problem. When do you want it?’

‘This gbeke’

Lawrence was practically dozing off behind his GAST textbook that night when Arku Korsah walked into his prefect’s room, practically breathless. In his hand was a brassiere.

‘I bring am. My name dey the list top now?’

Lawrence was speechless. He looked at him and shook his head.

‘Yeah.’

Classic case of things we do for love.

Lawrence had no intention of verifying whether or not it was actually Ampadu’s bra or not. The dead set determination in the boy’s eyes made him believe that if he had asked him to walk up to Gagert and slap her for a slot on the list, he would have done it.

Once you got on the list, you instantly became popular. People would bribe you to hand over a letter to one girl or another, to pass on a message to some guy or to come back with a message from someone. Dressing for Interco was another ball game altogether. The neatest and shortest skirts, the whitest shirts and the latest shoes suddenly emerged from their hiding places. Conrad was tasked to iron his school father’s interco shirt and he ended up burning it. Needless to say, he was kicked off the list and his school father had to settle for a not as white shirt for the competition. Ms. Ampadu made it a point to inspect the boys’ finger nails and make sure that the girls did not have make up on their faces. The final struggle was getting into a nice bus. Two buses transported the students to the stadium- Ewurakua and Old Jerry. Ewurakua was a relatively newer bus and most of the seniors wanted to sit in that one, because of the air conditioner and the more comfortable seats. Old Jerry had been there, way before K Beck’s eldest brother came to Capital High. The form ones could care less about which bus they sat in, because they would inevitably end up at the same destination.

Whenever they got to the stadium, they would have to file out nicely in two lines, under the eagle eye supervision of Ms Ampadu and Mr Amissah. There were tents allocated for each school and each student was to remain under the tent and cheer for his or her team. That was the plan in theory. However, in reality, that only lasted for the first two hours of the day. The cheering got dimmer as the game progressed and the seniors would move to the back of the tent to go and chat with their friends. Those from single sex schools had a hard time focusing on the game, since it had been so long since they had feasted their eyes on people of the opposite sex. Another exciting thing was meeting their lai momos from JSS. Capital High’s football team was putting up a good fight but their defense did not stop Okuapeman from scoring yet another goal. K Beck winced. The rivalry was real and he could already hear the taunts in his mind’s ear.

‘We have scored you! We have put pepper in your eyes!’

At the end of Thursday, the spirits of the Capital High team had been dampened. They had come in second in the football tournament and third in the relay races competition. K Beck missed Akpene sourly. He could hardly wait for the whole thing to be over so that he could go back to a normal life. On Friday morning, Denise developed a tummy ache. This meant that she could not go for the last day of Interco. She asked Akpene if she would like to go.

Akpene looked at her with her eyes widened.

‘Me?’

‘Yes. Isn’t your boyfriend playing?’

‘He is not my boyfriend.’

‘Whatever he is to you,he is playing. Maybe seeing you would give him some extra vim to score.’

And that is how Akpene ended up at Interco on Friday even though she did not stand a chance of making it onto the list. She was overwhelmed by the different faces and the different songs. The atmosphere was charged. It was like a big reunion- people were catching up with their friends from other schools. She looked out for K Beck. She had not told him that she was coming and she was looking forward to surprising him. She spotted him in the distance, with a white face towel sprawled over his shoulder. She smiled and started to make her way towards him.

She stopped in her tracks when a girl from Aggrey Memorial threw herself into his arms.

‘Kwamena Welbeck! I thought that was you. I have missed you.’

‘Kwansima! Boarding school looks good on you.’

‘I notice you didn’t say you had missed me too.’

‘I missed you, baby girl. I am not playing against your school today so cheer for me, okay?’

‘Will do. When you go back to school, don’t be a stranger. Look for me- for old times’ sake.’

‘I will. Take care, hun!’

Baby girl. Missed you. Cheer for me. Take care.

Akpene felt her stomach turning.

You are overreacting. There is nothing to it. He is just being nice. But why did the girl hug him? Is that not against school rules? Why is her voice so piercing?

She was so lost in thought that she didn’t see him walking towards her.

‘You came!’

‘Yes, I did. All the best in your game.’

K Beck didn’t have a chance to ask her why she was being cold because his coach signalled for him to come back to the court. Throughout the game, she kept looking back at the Kwansima girl and wondering why K Beck had never called her Baby Girl.

Maybe it is because I am not as pretty as she is.

The idea of K Beck giving any other girl attention was so alien to her that she felt a pit in her stomach. The game was getting heated. Both the Capital High and St. Augustine’s teams were doing their very best. The stakes were high! It was a tie: 87-87. On the spur of the moment, K Beck stole the ball from the St. Augustine’s point guard and raced for the hoop leaving the Augustine boys tailing him. He stopped at the 3 point arc and sank a swoosh. Those who were actually watching the game applauded. His team mate charged by K-Beck’s feat stole an in-house pass but was quickly cornered at the touch line. K-Beck availed himself for a pass, faked a shot and drove in for a lay-up shot.

When he made that final jump shot, Akpene and the whole of Capital High screamed in unison. Akpene probably shouted the loudest, waving her hands in the air, her insecurities drowned by the burst of pride that filled her heart. Thanks to K Beck, they were the Basketball Champions for 2013. She pushed her many questions to the back of her mind and joined in the chanting.

K Beck! K Beck! K Beck! K Beck!

See you next week..

Capital High Ep07: (In)justice

Hi! I am sorry you had to wait so long for this one. I lost the story when saving it and had to rewrite it, because a promise is a promise.  Hope you enjoy it! It was written with love- twice! Happy new year! 

Akpene could not sleep. She kept tossing and turning, wondering what she could do to fix the situation.
K Beck is in trouble because of me. What if he gets suspended? It is all my fault.

She kicked herself mentally for telling him her story. That was probably the only reason why he felt like he had to defend her. But then again, he had been looking out for her long before she told him about everything.

God, please help me. Just when I felt like things were not so bad, this happened. Please save him, please!

She could see a light under the tent that Sister Charissa had made around her bed. She was probably studying. Akpene smiled to herself when she smelt the Gashit* Charissa. It smelt heavenly- the combination of gari, shito, Starkist tuna flakes, corned beef, baked beans and sliced onion rings- the type of Gashit she could only dream of and not afford. Sister Charissa had all sorts of food stuffs under her bed and was always nibbling on something under her tent. Her school daughter was the one that Akpene pitied. She was the one who was sent to warm palm nut soup with an iron at 3am in the morning, the one who was sent to go and look for onions and tomatoes during siesta, the one who had to wash all the dishes and the one who never tasted any of her school mother’s inventions.

Across the room, she could see Agnes on the top bunk bed with her left leg suspending at an obtuse angle. Agnes’ sleeping patterns were always a source of amusement. One time, she had ended up with her head hanging from the edge of the bed, all the while sleeping soundly. The most amazing thing was the way she was able to maintain her balance throughout the night. She was not the only one with newsworthy sleep escapades. Nasiba was famous for sleep walking- people called her the Night Glider because she seemed to be gliding her way through corridors, mysteriously missing buckets and trunks, with her eyes shut. She had been known to walk from Liberty House to the basketball court, with a dreamy smile on her face. One time, she had ended up on the table in the staff common room in her cotton nightgown. It was Mr Hormeku who discovered her. It is rumoured that he exclaimed, ‘Lord God and Father of mankind!’ and rushed out to call the Form 1 girl who was sweeping the upper courtyard to come and cover her with a piece of cloth.

K Beck could also not sleep, not because he was worried about getting suspended but because he was sure that Akpene was probably blaming herself for getting him into trouble.

I wish I could talk to her. If only I was invisible or there was a way of crossing over without being caught…

Once again, he replayed the whole thing in his head.

Curtis was being a jerk that day. There had been many times that he had resisted the urge to punch him in the face ever since the term started, but that day, it seemed like Curtis was on Jerk Pentium Pro. He had spoken about Amanda’s breasts, Boakyewaa’s legs, Linda’s teeth and Constance’s butt. From the corner of his eye, he could see Adriana squirming in her seat and for the umpteenth time, he wondered what she saw in him. Just then, he heard Curtis saying, ‘And oh yes, how could I forget the Cinderella of the class? K Beck’s heartthrob! That girl’s body mehn! I am sure she has been giving him the time of his life. Her waist looks like it has had some experience, if you know what I mean. I would not mind a taste of-‘

K Beck’s fist knocked the words out of his mouth.

‘You picked the wrong guy to mess with. You will regret this!’

‘I doubt it, Curtis. No amount of punishment, not even suspension, can reduce the pleasure I have of being the only one bold enough to stand up to a jerk like you.’

K Beck also wondered if Akpene had heard what Curtis had said. He didn’t want her fretting about whether or not she looked like a virgin, or whatever it was that girls worried about. He saw the look of fear in her eyes when Mr. Hormeku pulled him up. The chants did not do much to help his case, if anything at all, they worsened it.

‘You think you are a hero because they are hailing you? Wait until tomorrow when you are brought before the Disciplinary Committee. You will be sorry!’

Muffled laughter broke his concentration. Some of the Form 2 boys were carrying Nii Adom to the bathhouse again. Nii Adom was the only person that K Beck knew that could probably sleep through a hurricane, an earthquake and a tsunami all at once, snoring and drooling while he was at it. Every now and then, some of the Form 2 boys would carry an unsuspecting Form 1 boy to the bathhouse in his sleep and leave him there. It was called transplanting. The poor boy would probably wake up on the cold tiled bathhouse floor, surrounded by buckets. Their favourite target was Nii Adom of course because they didn’t have to struggle to ensure that his eyes remained shut. One time, Cephas, one of the Form 2 boys, had gone to the extent of blowing one of those World Cup vuvuzelas directly into his ears when they had transplanted Nii Adom to the bathhouse. He did not even wince in his sleep. He simply turned sideways and also farted in a way that almost mirrored the sound of the vuvuzela. After that, the boys left him alone for one month but judging from what was happening now, his grace period was over.

Time check- 03:07am.

It was going to be a long night.

 

Papa Kofi Welbeck was used to making this journey. This was the first time he had had to make it for Kwamena. Strangely enough, he thought Kwamena could go through school without getting into trouble like his elder brothers did. By 7am, he was packed in front of Gagert’s office, waiting for her.

‘Mr Welbeck. Hello again! It has been ages.’

‘Yes, it has. I will go straight to the point. I do not think it would be in your interest to suspend my son.’

‘And why is that?’

‘If all my years in life have taught me anything, it is that one cannot fight on his own. There were two people in this fight. Why is my son the only one in trouble? Secondly, if what i heard was right, that boy deserved to be beaten. In fact, he deserves to be taught a lesson. No self respecting boy should talk about other girls like that. Thirdly, my son is the star of your basketball team. You are this close to winning the Interco this year and you are going to throw this away simply because my son chose to silence a bully? I don’t think so, Gertrude. You are smarter than that.’

‘I should have expected a defense like this. I don’t know why you didn’t take my advice to become a lawyer.’

‘Is that why you didn’t accept my marriage proposal? We could have had a happy life together, you and I. But that is a story for another day. Today’s visit is about Kwamena. I am not making excuses for him. He is a good kid- kind and empathetic like his mother. I just don’t think suspension is the answer.’

‘I agree.’

‘Good. How are you, Gertrude?’

‘I am tired. Papa, they are still fighting me for the school. I am tired of fighting.’

Reaching across the table, he held her hand, hoping that his silence would comfort her and knowing that she could hear all that he was not saying because with them, words weren’t neccessary.

Akpene could not believe her ears.

K Beck was not going to be suspended! 

It was like God was smiling down at her again. The whole assembly hall was buzzing with excitement. He was going to be suspended internally for a week, both he and Curtis. Mr. Hormeku’s face looked like thunder itself. After the scene he had made, this punishment felt like an anticlimax. Giving that boy 100 lashes would have felt more rewarding.

K Beck smiled to himself. This had his father written all over it. That man never ceased to amaze him. How he got to know the real story and how he managed to convince Gagert would just add to the list of ‘Reasons why I am convinced my father is a FBI agent or a superhero’. His eyes searched for Akpene’s. Their eyes met and they both smiled, both of them doing a secret happy dance in their hearts. Akpene turned her attention back to Gagert.

‘This time, they were let off easily. You might not be this lucky next time. This punishment is meant to be a deterrent to all of you. Think hard about it before you throw another punch or open your mouth to insult someone else.’

K Beck’s first assignment was to scrub all the male ‘downs’ before supper. It was an extra Herculean task because he had to make trips to the borehole to get enough water for the task. He was so engrossed in the work that he missed breakfast. Shortly after the siren went off, he saw Akpene running towards him with something wrapped in a polythene bag.

‘You smuggled bread out of the dining hall for me? Wow, I am touched. Thanks Akpene!’

‘That’s not all. I bought you a drink from the tuck shop as well. I know you don’t like Milo- it makes you sleepy, doesn’t it?’

K Beck was lost for words. Knowing how much of a sacrifice it must have been for her to buy him a drink, he said the only thing that came to mind.

‘You didn’t have to.’

‘No, but I wanted to. You are always doing nice things for me. It is my fault that you are even stuck here in the downs instead of listening to the dos and don’ts surrounding the Pythagoras theory. I finally got to do something for you too.’

Akpene was grinning from ear to ear, obviously pleased with herself. The sun was blazing and its rays were hitting her face. K Beck took off his gloves and used his hand to shield her face from the rays. Overcome by emotion, he leaned in and did the one thing he had been longing to do since the first day he rescued her- he gave her a peck on her left cheek.

‘Wait, what are you doing?’

See you next week!